Have you lost someone in your life and it seemed too unbearable
to face? The loss of a relationship, the
loss of a pet, the loss of a family member or the loss of a friendship. As I sit writing this, I can recall the painful
sting of watching a great love walk away, the decision of letting go of a pet
after eighteen years, recalling the funerals of all four of my grandparents and
a long-term friendship that needed to end in order to begin again. It’s painful, it’s awful, it’s lonely, and
it’s scary. At the time you wonder, “How
can I ever get through this pain?” Yet,
life’s mystery is the continued forward motion through unbearable loss that we
all find ourselves experiencing on this human journey, if we've truly LOVED.
John White was one of the first Englishman that felt
unbearable loss that this nation, known as America, was founded on. It is a painful story to tell.
John White, an artist at heart and adventurer by day, found
himself the governor of the first English Colony in 1587, known as the Roanoke
Colony. Throughout my research, John
White was excited to take this leap in leading the discovery of a new life, a
new world. I can just imagine his words
to convince his daughter who is pregnant, and son-in-law to pack up all
of their possessions, leave a life they’ve only knew, for an adventure across
an angry sea and the pending struggle to birth a new world. Were they eager, were they scared, were they
running from something, or were they just interested in starting over, building
a new world far away from the politics of England’s rule?
Six months into the new settlement, struggle of day-to-day
life was becoming overwhelming, and survival was questionable. It was a perfect storm, a drought caused hardship
on crops, uncertainty of friendly natives, and the pending starvation of colonist
were on everyone’s mind. All historical facts in my research revealed a decision
was made between the colonists and John White.
It was determined John White would return to England to gather
additional supplies to sustain the colony. So, the governor left the colony, to
return to England to receive much needed supplies. What was not expected was the war that broke
out between Spain and England, known as the Anglo-Spanish War. Without much thought, Queen Elizabeth authorized
John White to return to the colony with much needed supplies. However, due to the
war, John White’s return voyage to Roanoke Island was delayed for three years.
What must have John White felt? The agony must have followed him for three long
years. There was no way to get word back
to the colonist. It was war and John
White found himself right in the middle of the sacrifices that were made for
such greater causes. The pledging he must
have attempted. His worry was not only for the colonist, but also for his only
daughter and his new born grandchild. The
nights he must have cried himself to sleep knowing that his failure to return
would possibility have devastating effects.
The whirlwind of despair, the persistent praying he must have
endured.
I’m sure John was hoping his prayers were answered and somehow
the small Roanoke Colony would’ve managed to survive. Yet, all anyone found was an abandon colony,
a dismantled settlement with only one clue.
It was the word, “CROATOAN.” This
word was found on two trees that would have been within the settlement. CROATOAN was the name of a friendly native
tribe that befriended the Colony. John
continued his search for his family along with the colonists he left behind as
well as the Croatoan tribe, but his search turned up no further clues.
Three years after two failed attempts to locate his family
and the colonist, John White died. There
is no record of illness or suicide. Some
say, “John White died of a broken heart.”
The unbearable loss of such unfortunate circumstances. I could not even imagine the guilt Mr. White carried
those last three years of his life. Yet,
some say, “John died knowing in his heart, his family was still alive even
though no proof provided evidence of those assumptions.”
So, the Roanoke Colony became known in history as “THE LOST
COLONY”.
It is rare to find individuals in the United States that
truly know the unbearable loss and sacrifices John White paid to establish the
first English Colony. The birth of a
nation came at a great price for his family, but it is because of those who were
willing to take dangerous risks that our nation was born. And it all began under the leadership of an
artist, an adventurer known as John White.
------------------------------------------------------
What if there is another outcome for Mr. White’s family and
the lost colonist? Perhaps, his assumptions
were right. Maybe some of the colonist
survived. Maybe his daughter and
grandchild did survive. What if, the
abandoned colony was discovered two years prior to the return of the
broken-hearted John White? It’s
plausible. It’s possible, because the
research is pointing in a direction that would affirm Mr. White’s assumptions.
Viewing John White's original art of the new world at the British Museum in London.
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